8 Ways To Effectively Manage Conflict Situations

Almost everyone dislikes conflict. In fact, most people try to avoid it if possible. However, it is very important that children of all ages (and adults) develop conflict resolution skills. Understanding when they are involved in conflict and how to effectively handle the situation can help improve relationships, increase understanding, and reduce tension between individuals. Below are eight ways to effectively manage a conflict situation.

1. Stop, breathe, and think - Avoid reacting. Realize the changes in your body (heart rate increases, adrenaline rush. Take a few deep breaths, and tell yourself “I can handle this situation.”
   
   
2. Respond to the person with statements that will not escalate the conflict - Examples:
   
   

           “Thanks for letting me know how you feel.”

           “I’m sorry that you are hurt. That was not my intent.”

           “I hear you.”

           “You have a compelling perspective. Let me think about that.”

1. Remove yourself from the situation - You can say the following: “I will talk to you when I am calm.” or “I will talk to you when you are calm.” Talking when both parties are angry does not help take steps toward a reasonable resolution.
   
   
2. Be aware of your body language and the words you choose to use - Bad body language never whispers, and the wrong choice of words can make the situation much worse.
   
   
3. Use a lower tone of voice - A soft, calm, and confident voice can be very powerful.
   
   
4. Avoid using statements that lay blame - They only make the situation worse, and show that you are not taking responsibility for your actions if you are wrong.
   
   
5. Deal with the issue at hand - Only discuss what is relevant to the situation at hand. Adding unrelated subjects to the conversation will only “add fuel to the fire”.
   
   
6. Reflect - Think about how you will/can effectively handle a similar situation if it were to arise in the future. Use each conflict situation as a learning experience to help further strengthen your conflict resolution skill set.